Bush Comes to Dinner Thu. July, 24 at 01:00 pmPresident Bush comes to dinner when Stan wins an essay-writing contest. Hayley is determined to bring down the presidency after Roger accidentally gets Bush drunk. Meanwhile, Roger thinks he's found Osama bin Laden.
American Dream Factory Thu. July, 24 at 01:30 pmStan feels like he's not climbing the ladder fast enough at work, so he turns to his lifelong ambition of making festive teddy bears. However, when he realizes that making a quick profit takes a lot of work, he resorts to using illegal aliens as cheap labor.
A.T. The Abusive Terrestrial Thu. July, 24 at 02:00 pmFeeling shunned by Steve, Roger befriends a new boy, Henry. Their honeymoon is short lived as Henry starts abusing Roger. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine hijack the Pibbmobile in an effort to save the fledgling soft drink from going off the market forever.
Black Mystery Month Thu. July, 24 at 02:30 pmWhile researching a paper about George Washington Carver in celebration of Black History Month, Steve uncovers a conspiracy that's been going on since the Civil War. When the curator of the Smithsonian Peanut Museum reaches out to tell Steve the truth, he's mysteriously murdered, and Steve and Stan are tracked by a secret society that will stop at nothing to keep this scandalous secret of American history.
Apocalypse to Remember, An Fri. July, 25 at 01:00 pmA misunderstanding at the CIA leads Stan to believe it's the end of the world. Even after he realizes his error, he keeps his family convinced they are the last people on Earth so they can respect him. Meanwhile, Roger gets married so he can buy a new blender.
Four Little Words Fri. July, 25 at 01:30 pmStan goes to great lengths to never, ever end up in a situation ending with Francine telling him, "I told you so." She lets him hook his boss Bullock up with her friend, but when Bullock accidentally kills the woman, Stan frames Francine so that she'll stop asking questions.
When Stan Loves a Woman Fri. July, 25 at 02:00 pmStan gets jealous when he discovers how promiscuous Francine's past really was. He decides the only way to even the score is to divorce Francine and sow some wild oats of his own. Meanwhile, Steve gets addicted to an energy drink.
I Can't Stan You Fri. July, 25 at 02:30 pmStan drives himself crazy worrying about the neighborhood's opinion of him. Roger and Steve become con artists.
Magnificent Steven, The Mon. July, 28 at 01:00 pmStan takes Steve and his friends on a cattle drive through Langley Falls in an effort to turn them into men. But when Stan eats beef tainted with mad cow disease, it's up to the boys to save the day. Meanwhile, Roger pits Francine and Hayley against each other for his own amusement.
Joint Custody Mon. July, 28 at 01:30 pmStan tries to get an unsuspecting Jeff Fischer out of his life for good by taking him on a road trip to Florida where there is a warrent out for Jeff's arrest. Meanwhile, Roger wants to turn Jeff in himself so he can claim the reward money. The rest of the family wants to intervene as Stan and Roger battle it out on the road, but they are stranded at the Smith house until they can find Francine's car keys.